A real man can...

...admit when he's wrong.

Robin Mark has come and gone. But once again, I thoroughly enjoyed his concert. Kevin and I were joking before the concert that he'll probably sit down with me at dinner and say, "well Chris, I read your blog." That would've sucked.

I'm still not sure that his music is me but I appreciate who he is and what he did this weekend. Simply put, he allowed himself to be used by God to bless the Valley. He could've gone for more cash. Or more prestige than Duncan. He was tired and could've just taken a break. Or gave a half-hearted effort since we wouldn't have really known anyways. But he didn't. He played his heart out not for one show but for 2, 2.5 hour shows in one day. He was flexible with his song selection and even gave the spotlight to a 10 year old girl to dance not once but twice.

What is most impressive isn't his music. It's who he is. Just a simple man trying to live for God. Make a difference in the world for Him. There is no doubt he's talented and gifted as a guitarist, singer, preacher - but his ministry to me wasn't those things. It was the man inside.

I never got to know the Gaither's. But never once in my life did I ever think I would want to be like them. I'd be proud to be known as someone with half the integrity that Robin Mark showed this weekend.

Paying taxes

Nobody likes paying taxes. But of all the people that dislike taxes, I'm on the low end in terms of how much I hate them. I don't mind paying tax so that I have roads to drive on and a health care system that, despite all its flaws, works better than any other in the world. And I'm proud of the fact that we have a social system that is better than most in the world as well.

I was reminded the other day about a certain aunt and uncle of mine that Eric and I happen to strongly dislike. Besides the personality and history issues that we have with them, they also take advantage of the Canadian system - just as I'm sure many many others do.

They live in Hong Kong. But many years ago, they tried immigrating here. They bought a business and after a half-assed attitude at making a go of it, they sold it - complained about Canada and decided to go back to HK to work. But they kept a house here and are dual citizens. Each year, for about 3 weeks, they come here for holidays. During that time, they book appointments for every conceivable medical test/procedure that they can think of. And hand in a care card number to pay for it. They don't pay one cent of income tax. The only tax they pay is the GST/PST because they have to eat while they are here. And they complain.

Recently, the Canadian government is trying to cut some of this off by taxing citizens that have holdings and make money elsewhere. And what do my relatives do? Complain about it.

I hope they complain sometime at a family dinner while I'm there. I'd love to tell them what I think. TAKE A HIKE! WE DON'T WANT YA.

Stingyness killed the cat.

It would be fair to say that I like having nice things. I'm not a 'simple life' kinda guy (pardon the Paris Hilton comparison). I'm never going to be someone that will live in a shack, eat food grown off my land, walk everywhere I go and solar power my way into eternity. I like what I like and I will spend to get it. That's me.

Being in the profession I'm in (if you want to call it a profession), I've always been kinda ashamed about that. I'm well aware that my income comes from the hard earned dollars of people - some of which don't have very much. They are giving their money to God - and not to support the extravagant lifestyle of the pastor. So I've always kinda hid my excesses and my taste for the nicer things.

But just as much as I like to have bigger, better things, I also love to share what I have. I'd have no problem lending my car away or buying stuff so I can enjoy it with friends. Why do I want a bigger house or a bigger TV? It's so I can invite more people over to enjoy it with me. I don't want bigger better stuff for me. I like having it to share and give away. I don't horde things. If I have it, you are welcome to use it.

I also discovered that I hate stingyness. Even the perception of it. I can't stand it when people hold on to things that tightly. I can understand someone not wanting to lend me stuff because for the most part, I'm someone that can afford what I need. But when people have a lot and don't share it with those that don't have much or worse yet, complain about having to pay luxury tax on their yacht and stuff like that. GET OVER YOURSELF!

Of all the people in the world, of all the institutions in the world, the least stingy place should be the church and Christians. Generosity is God's character! Yet churches and Christians are among the most stingy people around sometimes! They have rooms in churches that they don't want people to use because they'll get dirty. They buy electronic equipment and stuff that can't get used on any day but Sunday and only by this one person. GET OVER YOURSELF! We want a big deal every time we give something to God - all the pomp and circumstance. You know what God did with loot given following the taking of a city by Israel? He wanted it burned! It reminded the people that IT DOESN'T BELONG TO THEM! If God wants to burn it, then burn it. What if we did THAT on Sunday morning? Our offering is God's. This church is God's. What about the poor or missions or whatever else you think the money would have been able to help with? God is rich. He'll look after it. Obedience and sacrifice first. Quit trying to justify your stingyness with holy clothing. You just want to buy another carpet.

(*Chris is making sure this is in the RIGHT blog this time.)

something's just have to get said

It's 2:45 on Tuesday afternoon and normally I try not to do personal stuff at work. (stop laughing) But somethings just need to get said.

Right now I am drinking the best mocha frappacino I've ever had. I'm not sure why but for some reason, my body craved it like only a pregnant woman would understand. It was enough for me to get out into the rain, drive my car down to Starbucks, and fork out 5 bones to get it. Until recently I was strictly a Timmy Ho's man (being a true Canadian and all) but when it comes to cold blended drinks, Starbucks beats St. Timothy hands down.

Anyhow I need to work more here. The day is escaping me. I just had to stop to tell whoever would listen. Call it Mocha Frappacino evangelism. It's saved me today.

Leading stuff

You'd think that after being in ministry for the last 15 years, I wouldn't get nervous leading stuff. But I do. Something was said at a funeral a while back that stuck with me. Something like "be careful what you say because once you say it, it becomes a thing in itself". Being someone that speaks as (or sometimes before) i think, that kinda scared me. But I think it's true. When something is in your head, it's just a thought and has no real substance - except to you. But once you say it, it is up for interpretation and takes a life of its own as people hear it, talk about it, scrutinize it - whatever they want. It becomes a separate entity altogether to you.

That's partly why I get nervous. That my thoughts are going to actually potentially mean something to someone - good or bad. That my thoughts can actually help or harm. That somewhere, someday, someone might remember what I said and do something else with it.

The other part is just pure insecurity. What will people think of me? Will they like it? Agree with it? Will I fit in? what gives me the right to say something about this with any authority?

I know what the answer is to this all though. It's God. I am just Chris. I'm not super Chris and definitely not Jesus Christ. I just need to give God my best in ministry. Love people my best. Give grace the best I can. Represent Jesus the best I can. And then I pray and ask forgiveness a lot for how I've fallen short. But my accounting is with God and not what others or even I think about it. So maybe it's good I'm a bit insecure about it? It just reminds me of where I need to stay focussed.

I played in a volleyball tournament yesterday. Crazy fun. I forgot just how much I like being out in the sun with friends, soft green grass, on a lawn chair with cold drink in hand, watching or playing volleyball. It was quite likely one of the best days I've had since I've come to Duncan.

That would be ideal heaven for me. Except no crazy sunburns like I have. And I can jump a lot higher than I do. And I wouldn't ache afterwards. But it does make me wonder what about yesterday was so great. It wasn't how well I played cause I didn't play all that great.
I think it was the friendships. The laughter. The not needing to be some place else. Just enjoying being alive.

another thing I dislike

One of the hats I wear is Youth Pastor. Somehow that means that people think they can get me to get teens to do stuff for them for little to nothing. I'm not complaining that we should do stuff always for money or fundraising for something. But guess what? Kids don't like doing stuff that is like chores at home. I'm all for the youth helping out but it should come from them and not from me saying, "we're going to do this today and that tomorrow". My role is to build relationships with them and while sometimes it means we do stuff to help out, it shouldn't be taken for granted. The number of times I've heard someone say, "oh the youth should do that". Well how would people feel if we saw dirty dishes in the sink and we said, "oh the ladies should take care of that" or if there was garden looked bad, "hey, you're over 75! Go plant something."

The teens need to learn to serve and give. But they also need to be asked and not told. That means they can say no just like you or I could when we get asked to do something. And if people think asking me is going to mean they are going to say yes, you don't know me very well. I'm not going to use up my relational currency with the teens to do something that I don't think they'll enjoy just because it's me asking. I'd rather use that currency to get them to go to camp or Creationfest or a retreat.