on being a stay at home dad

Well I've officially been a stay at home dad for one day now. It's easy.

I'm kidding. (That comment was for Kathleen's benefit when she reads this.)

But just generally speaking, it's easier than I thought it would be. Not because it's easy - but more because I expected it to be really hard.

There's the usual stuff. Kids argue, get restless, want to eat a snack constantly, always want my attention, I can't get anything done, no space to myself. (So far in this blog, I have gotten up 5 times and it's taken me 25 minutes since I'm currently also cooking lunch, watching the kids in the backyard, doing the dishes and cleaning the mess from this morning). I expect that I'll have a meltdown somewhere in the summer because I have no time to myself and I've lost independence. Work is never done as a stay at home parent either which isn't appealing. And, I'm not a stay at home person - period.

But with that said, there were things that I expected to be great. Like having time with the kids with no rush or agenda. Like being able to have flexibility in my day to do whatever I feel like that day - more or less. Like having some time at home to get the house the way we want it. Like having time outdoors at the beach, in the park. Like rediscovering my childhood again doing things I have long since outgrown.

What makes this easier than I'd thought though is the unexpected. The past couple hours, with no prompting from me, Rachel and Jordan have been playing together surprisingly well. Jordan talked to Rachel on her pink, plastic cell phone pretending to talk to Logan while Rachel pretended to talk to Jordan. Rachel gets to be Luke Skywalker when they have light sabre fights. (Apparently, Swiper the Fox gets a light sabre as well sometimes.) It's simply the best watching them play.

Rachel comes up to me about every half an hour wanting a hug from her dad. Jordan has asked me a few times the answer to some trivia fact he's been obviously thinking about for some time. They are both so genuinely happy that they get a whole daddy day - every day. I get to discipline in a discipling way rather than as the authoritarian daddy that comes home after work with the "you're gonna get it" voice. I get to set the house rules for that day. The best part of all - I have seen me in each of them - when they play and talk together.

It's gonna be a tough summer but I'm pretty sure it's also gonna be one of the best of my life.