the unedited version

In my other blog, I just wrote down a few thoughts about the liberal evangelical spectrum in our church. It's how I feel but edited for church reading. Here's where it came from.

For whatever reason, I've always been a pretty moderate person able to get along with different people. I'm the Christian that has a lot of non-Christian friends. I'm the non churchy guy that pastors a church. I'm the evangelical that has many liberal friends. Good or bad - that's just me. I know some people call me wishy washy and maybe even lukewarm but frankly, I don't really give a crap. It's who I am and being able to relate to people makes me a good pastor. I know what I believe.

It's a fight though. In my first presbytery meeting I attended while at Regent College, I was invited out with the "evangelical" crowd following the meeting. During that time, they put down just about every liberal, feminist or female in the meeting. It was WAY worse than any of the bashing that my non Christian friends would give to anyone. It was personal and very nasty. The problem was that some of those liberals they were talking to were good friends of mine. That was the last time I went out with those "spiritual" clergy and elders. Each Presbytery, I sat with my friends - most of whom were the people that I didn't share theology with but whom I respected and loved. To their credit, they may have been liberal but they never once put down the other people. But they did put down and express some hatred around the evangelical camp of the church - not specific to people - but just comments like, "How can evangelicals think they are the only way to heaven?" "how can they say that the Bible is literal and God's word?" etc. etc. etc. And then they would always look over and say something like, "you don't think that do you?"

I don't normally let theology get in way of friendships or how I see people. My father in law has a liberal theology and in the interest of family, we don't talk about the things that divide us. I know what he thinks. He knows we don't agree. So we just stay away from it. With many of these friends, I guess they just aren't used to an evangelical that isn't pushy and judgemental.

But maybe I'm not pushy enough. I probably need to be more outspoken about this than I am.

But to the evangelicals and liberals reading this, get over yourselves. Grow up. God's judging us both.

Counting my blessings

This fall has been absolutely insane for me. Could well be the busiest my life has ever been. It's competing with one summer in 1996 when I was working half time as a youth pastor in the evenings and weekends, full time as a teen leadership director for Boys and Girls Clubs during the weekdays and taking two courses at UVIC. It's also competing with 1998-2000. At this point, I'm married. Kathleen is working full time. I'm working 30 hours a week as a youth pastor and studying full time at Regent College.

This time around, the other pastor at the church is on Sabbatical which for all intents and purposes was 5 months long (including his summer holidays etc that I covered at the church). While I've done maternity leave before and shouldered solo pastor type responsibilities at my last church, it was never for a congregation this size with a very active ministry life. I'm also coaching senior boys volleyball which is three days a week of practice and tournaments on most weekends. Kathleen is away 2-3 days a week so I'm doing all the dad duties on those days. And then there's a hockey league that Eric and I share - which isn't as busy as it could be this fall but still occupies time and mental space. SO....I've had many many 16 hour days the past several months. I'm very tired. But very thankful. Here's my list...

-every week I've gotten numerous phone calls, thank you and encouragement cards from people that have been praying for me.

-I LOVE my church - the people, the leadership team, the worship, the everything. They love me like God does. Allowing me try and fail and be myself.

-I LOVE my kids. They are so innocent, so vulnerable, so impressionable. They love me like God does. Unconditionally. Even when they get grumpy, "early morning" dad.

-I LOVE my wife. We've been together now for 14 years and knows me better than i know myself. And she still looks at me like I'm the best guy in the world. She loves me like God does. Even when I'm stinky and spouting off about my next big project.

-I LOVE my friends and family. I was away from the island for 10 years and now that I'm back, it's like nothing has changed with my old friends and family. They are truly the most amazing people I know. They too love me like God does.

-I LOVE being me. There's still many areas that this isn't done but in the last few years, I can honestly say that I've been happy in my skin - not feeling like I need to prove something to anyone else or myself. MOST of the time, I think I'm growing in the right direction.

-I LOVE Duncan. Ok, let's not get carried away. How about I don't dislike it? I DO like the Cowichan Valley and God has given me a burden for the people here. That's good enough i hope?

-I LOVE hockey. The smell of the ice. The smell of my gear. The smell of the league. All of it.

Life is just good.